Category Archives: Desiring Change

Small Change Big Results: The Power of Compound Living.

Compound Interest is Powerful

If you take $1 and save it, every week, for twenty five years, you would have $1,300. Not bad for a less than the cost of a donut. But, and this is the key, take that same $1 and invest it, adding $1 a week for 25 years, at a market average return of 9.19% (a which is the average market return adjusted for inflation 1988-2013), you would have $4,946.88. That’s $3646.88 (281%) more than saving it. Compound interest is a powerful thing.

Compound Living is Powerful

This post is not about your finances, so why am I waxing eloquent on compound interest? Because the same principle holds true in lifestyle design. You can save your energy or invest it. Your choice determines the difference in how effective your life will be. That is why some people are hundreds of times more effective than others, even though we all have the same 525,949 minutes a year. Time is what this is really all about.

Finding Time

According to International Business Times (http://www.ibtimes.com/average-us-adult-spends-21-minutes-day-facebook-1691274) the average person–as of September 2014–spent 21 minutes a day on FaceBook. So, 21 x 7 x 52 x 25 = 191,100 minutes or 3,184 hours or 132.71 days. Oh, BTW, those are 24 hour days. If you want to look at it like work days…398.125 work days.

Now, I’m not about to bash FaceBook. The platform is amazing and useful, but it’s hard to look at those numbers and still say, “I don’t have time to do something amazing. There just aren’t enough hours in the day.” Imagine what we could do with our lives if we took back 10 of those minutes each day.

Small changes create big rewards

Small changes in how we use our time create big rewards over time

DailyImprovementsQuote

I’ll save you the arithmetic. By taking back ten minutes a day, we would gain ourselves 190 work days over 25 years. That’s a lot of time to build a business, volunteer for a cause that matters, or write the book you know you should be writing.

Small changes in how we use our time create big rewards over time. Where are you losing out on future riches by “saving” time instead of investing it? What could you accomplish in the next five, ten, or twenty-five years by finding ten extra minutes a day?

If you can’t find 10 extra minutes a day, you’re doing something wrong. Try this: https://www.headspace.com/ or stop by http://balanceisbunk.com and connect with me. I’ll help you figure it out.

The Simple Phrase that Increases Effort 40%

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Every effective leader and coach knows that there’s no moment more important than the moment feedback is delivered. When you perform this important process correctly, the learner takes a step forward. Do it poorly, and the reverse happens.

Daniel Coyle asks this great question, “What’s the secret of great feedback?” Coyle says “we instinctively think that effective feedback is about the quality of the information — telling the learner to do this and not that. But is this true, or is there something else going on?”

Leading psychologists from leading institutions including Stanford, Yale and Columbia addressed this same question. They had middle-school teachers assign an essay-writing assignment to their students, after which students were given different types of teacher feedback.

To their utter astonishment, researchers discovered that there was one particular type of teacher feedback that improved student effort and performance so much that they considered it “magical.” Students who received this feedback chose to revise their paper far more often that students who did not (a 40 percent increase among white students; 320 percent boost among black students) and improved their performance significantly.

What was the magical feedback?

Just one sentence:

I’m giving you these comments because I have very high expectations and I know that you can reach them.

That’s it. Simple, 19 words. Not only this is great feedback, but a signal that creates something more powerful: a sense of belonging and connection. Growing up as a child who had ADHD, I remember how my mom consistently used this type of feedback. Though I didn’t believe it on the outset, her constant reminders helped me change my belief culminating into a transformation of behavior and achievement of goals that seemed rather impossible at that time. (Read more on the fascinating study of Pygmalion effect HERE)

Looking closer, the sentence contains several distinct signals:

1) You are part of this group.
2) This group is special; we have higher standards here.
3) I believe you can reach those standards.

I love how Coyle follows up with these insights:

“The key is to understand that this feedback isn’t just feedback — it’s a vital cue about the relationship. The reason this works so well has to do with the way our brains are built. But when we receive an authentic, crystal-clear signal of social trust, belonging, and high expectations, the floodgates click open.”

Coyle offers three, relevant lessons for leaders and coaches based on this finding:

First, connect: like John Wooden said, they can’t care how much you know until they know how much you care.
Highlight the group: seek ways (traditions, mantras, fun little rituals) to show what it means to belong in your crew.
Don’t soft-pedal high standards. Don’t pretend that it’s easy — do the opposite. Emphasize the toughness of the task, and your belief that they have what it takes.

I’m Dying.

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The news was not good. It was neither what we expected, nor wanted to hear.

Terminal

My condition is terminal; there is no known cure. And what treatments there are will cost, in both personal lifestyle, comfort and funds. And even then they will, at best, only extend my life for a relatively short time.

It’s the kind of news that causes you to rethink your life, to refocus, to make amends, even to make drastic changes in behaviour, all in the hope of extending, or making the best of, what time you’ve got left.

Death has a way of making us alive.

I’ve never heard of a dying person saying: “Oh I wish I’d worked longer hours”, or “I’ll never forgive so and so.” or “I just want to be alone.” Death has a way of giving us life;, of clarifying what’s important.

So why do we put in more time and effort into our work than we do with our families?

Why do we hold on so tight to that incident back then that fractured that relationship?

Why do we wait until we’re dying to live for what’s of lasting value?

Why do we wait until a loved one dies before we tell them what we loved and valued about them?

Death Sentence

This news of my “death sentence” is causing me to take serious stock of my life, to evaluate, to make changes. And in so doing, I hope, with what little time I have left, to make a positive impact on my world: to change my world by changing myself.

life01 I hope to leave my family and friends with a legacy of life that will carry them through their grief and into a new world without me. To guide them through the valley of the shadow of death and into a new and open vista of all they can be. To inspire them to live their life with passion and courage.

Now here’s the shocker: that condition I was diagnosed with? LIFE!

I have the terminal condition of life.

Every day we live is one day closer to death.

We all die! We just don’t like to admit it. We hope and plan to live for 20 or 30 years, but the truth is each of us could die tonight. Death is the harsh reality of life.

Every day we live is one day closer to our death. Not all of us get the kind of news that they’re dying? But the truth is WE’RE ALL DYING! We’re all under a death sentence.

The question is: “What will you do with the life you have left?”

Share your comments below. Inspire me and others with how you’re preparing for your death with living today.

Have You Recharged Today?

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As we become overloaded with technology and the “social” world we live in, communication gets lost along the way. It is so much easier to “share” and “like”, to type a quick “hey, been awhile, I miss you!”, calling on the phone is so very personal these days.

recharge6 I was horribly guilty of this, being a complete and total introvert who prefers books to people, social media pretty much was the best invention ever. I got so bad my husband actually threatened to break my phone. Reality check. The world was passing me by and I was missing out. I started putting my phone down, engaging with my coworkers, opening doors for the random nurse in the hallway, and best of all, I picked up my pen.

Don’t get me wrong I think technology is wonderful, however all things are best in moderation.

I have been inspired, my marriage is renewed, I have an overwhelmingly strong bond with my child, because I started engaging my world. However the more I set technology aside the more I took notice of its effect. As I began looking up I realized just how many people move along without ever glancing at their surroundings. They are missing out on all the small and special moments that make life worth living.

recharge5 Just the other day I was sitting in the cafeteria on my lunch break ( I should premise that I work in a hospital) and this little boy who was a patient at the time was surrounded by his family. As they were leaving the cafeteria this little boy was in obvious pain and was struggling to walk and a little girl- maybe four years old- whom I presume was his sister ran over to him and grabbed his hand reassuringly with the most loving smile on her face. She supported him as they walked away and it just made my day to be reminded of the good we all have in us, of the gentleness and caring that children so easily express.

Had I been absorbed with an application on my phone I would have missed this precious moment. This is the same reason I try to keep my phone and/or laptop put away at home, and any other place I am with my family, until after everyone is asleep. I want to be present to cherish each moment with my ever growing daughter, I want to give my husband the rapt attention he deserves. We are only given one shot at each day why not make that shot count?

I still shy away from calling when I can send a text or email, however I think it would be beneficial to challenge myself to connect with others in a more sincere way. Would it not be beneficial for us all to try to reestablish the emotional connection that is hearing one another’s voice?

If we begin to step away from the keyboard, we will realize how rusty our instinctual graces are in the presence of actual breathing, tangible individuals. We have to reboot our brain to work at its regular pace, this overdrive that we pace ourselves at takes a toll. After all, when we are constantly juggling screens and monitors and telephones, it strains our energy to the breaking point. The first thing to go is the empathy, compassion and emotional connection we have for other beings. Emotion in and of its self is very taxing, but an already over-tapped mind will struggle to keep up with general every day connections.

Just as we have to recharge our technology we have to recharge ourselves. Without adequate “vacation” time away from our devices we become emotionally dull. That is we loose our fervor, our zeal, our passion. How can we connect with each other if we are indifferent? So unplug from the tech world and tune into your surroundings, who knows what magic you might witness.

3 Things I Learned From Being Laid Off

Quit for Success

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“Quitters never win; winners never quit.”

What if this were NOT the golden rule of success? What if to see success, you had to quit?

The measure of a person is seen in the price they will pay for the ideals they hold.

My wife and I met while volunteering with a non-profit organization. At that time I had been involved with this organization for almost 17 years and been a member of its Board of Directors for 10 years. The organization and its work held very deep meaning for me; and still does.

Shortly after marrying, the Board became divided over an issue that began to consume important time at meetings. I was on one side, seeing very clearly the route ahead through this issue. “Bob” (not his real name), was entrenched on the other side, seeing equally clearly an opposing route through the issue. It seemed that the more meetings we had on the issue, the more entrenched the two sides became in our opposition.

It was a difficult time because I knew that the route I was proposing was the right thing; if the organization chose Bob’s route, it would encounter more difficulty which would impact its daily operations. I knew that Bob cared more than I did for the organization and its work, yet he was clearly wrong in his vision for the way through this issue. I knew I was right, and for the sake of the organization, I had to persevere in advocating for the best vision. It was then that I made the hardest decision: I quit the Board!

Quitting

I didn’t quit in a huff; there were no demands of reform or I’ll leave; all I gave was a simple resignation without condition. And while I have never since served on its board, my wife and I have continued to support it financially and on many occasions we’ve rolled up our sleeves, giving up our vacations, to serve in its programs.

Success

Within 3 months of my resigning, Bob changed his position entirely and was advocating for the same route that I had been. The organization made the decision to follow the route that I – and now Bob – advocated. And in the 15 years since, it has continued to function and flourish.

Internal Conflict Corrodes

Many organizations have collapsed due to internal conflicts over vision. Their collapse is not due to choosing one vision over another, rather it’s caused by the corrosive effect internal conflict has; eating away at the very foundation of the organization: it’s people. When internal conflict – whether as benign as volunteers asking for why things are done a certain way, or as malignant as an outright power struggle – is not addressed in a healthy and positive way, the foundation is weakened. If nothing is done to answer questions or resolve the power struggle, the weakened foundation begins to crumble; support (or clients) begins to dry up; volunteers become harder to find; staff tensions become more prominent; productivity wanes; morale evaporates and eventually the organization collapses or experiences a seismic, almost cataclysmic shift in direction.

You are only accountable for yourself!

It was not an easy decision to quit. I had a number of people question my commitment. Yet I subconsciously knew the price the organization would pay if I (or Bob) didn’t quit. It was obvious that Bob and I were deeply entrenched – neither was going to yield – so the organization was going to suffer. In fact it was already beginning to show signs of foundational crumble. It was Bob or I that had to go, and since I’m only accountable for myself, I knew the price I had to pay for the success of the organization that I was so deeply committed to: that price was my resignation.

What price are you willing to pay for the success of your organization?

What organization are you deeply committed to? How do you handle the internal conflicts that arise? What’s the price you’re willing to pay for its success? Are you willing to quit?

Share your comments below…

Dan Knight

Change The World by Changing Yourself